Welcome back, Chris. It’s been a while since you got off your lazy ass and started writing again. I wanted to share part of what is going on in my mind these days, how my logic is functioning and how I’m putting it to use in my life.
For the few people who don’t already know, I have an unreal love for mathematics. Last year, I was an engineering student. Today I’m a maths major and I honestly couldn’t be any happier with my new major. My point is, look for what you love and do it, no matter the obstacles. It’s your personal satisfaction that is more important, not anyone else’s.
Another important decision I made a while back is to keep my personal life to myself. It’s hard when you voluntarily dismiss the opportunity to open up to someone, but it pays off quickly. Comming from a very sensitive person, keeping your personal life to yourself is harder than it seems. I’ve made a choice of the people I’d open up to only when I’m about to snap, and it’s one of the best decisions I’ve made so far. It has rendered me more stable around my many social groups and when I’m alone by myself, believe it or not.
While I’m on the topic of keeping things to myself, a very important thing I’m keeping to myself is the music I write. I’ve noticed that once I share some of the music I write, I discover all the flaws of it (the ones that I personally consider flaws) and i start disliking it to the point where I give up on my projects. By not sharing, I started writing more songs, ones that I enjoy more than anthing I’ve written in a long while. Also, whenever I find something I dislike about my songs, I can change them and nobody has to know of m mistakes/bad ideas unless I inform them. My confidence in playing guitar has never been higher.
Well that was a little anecdote from my life the past few months. I hope this helps someone take a right decision.Until the next time!
Stay awesome and Keep Blogging!
– Chris K.
on a cold summer night, i hit the woods
to disconnect for a little while
when i threw away all the goods
and i let my thoughts fly
some good music was playing with the sound of nature
i cant hear but the sound of silence
i hear my own thoughts again, after a long break
i try to stay grounded but im lightheaded
im flying away to the sound of crickets and bats
i look to the ground to see my shadow
then i look up to see people wandering just as i was
i can feel a happy vibe, it just isn’t with me yet
i will make it mine someday, i will be the person i want to be happy.
Sometimes, I feel that I just need a break from the world. I feel that I just want to give up on myself and let myself go.
I still have the darkest of thoughts every now and then. I will not stop them from haunting me anytime soon. They’ve become a part of who I am.
Every once in a while, I grab my guitar and I start strumming. I think to myself “Wow. This might make someone happy.” But then I remember that I’m still not on a headlining tour. I proceed to record whatever I was playing, hoping to get something out of it.
That one time, one of the people I sent one of my recordings to replied with “you just made me the happiest person on earth.” I teared up that night. At that point, the fire I put off was ignited again.
But then again, I still love to be alone. I will remain silent if I’m not at ease. I will stop interacting with any other human if I feel nervous. The only thing I would be focusing on would be my empty mind.
Many of my classmates notice me writing down some lyrics during philosophy period. It’s not that i dont like philosophy. It’s just that lyrics express my point of view better than plain text.
Considering what my teacher tells us (that philosophy is a way of thinking and not static material), i prefer to write down my lyrics during philosophy periods, inspired by the specific lesson or topic we’d be discussing.
Point of this anecdote is that you should have your own philosophy i.e. your own ideas and your own way of expression. If it’s through public talks, then do so. If it’s through music, do that. All that matters is that you express yourself and let the world know how you think.
It doesnt really matter when people tell you your opinion doesnt matter. Every single word that comes out of your beautiful mind can affect the world in some way.
Don’t be afraid of expressing, one day you’re going to pass away with all your ideas. Make them matter.
– Chris K.
Music speaks when words fail
Music is one of the very few things that are able to entirely stimulate a human brain. A person’s taste in music can tell a whole story about the person, without the person actually talking about it.
And as we all know, each person prefers a different genre of music. And this genre will tell you something about this person, despite the fact that some people *like myself* have a very large variety of genres on their music players. Even this seemingly bipolar taste in music, in my case pop-punk and heavy metal, can give people an idea of my life at the moment.
And as much as people tell me that my music taste isn’t a good one, or is stupid, I don’t really give a damn about it. If I’m glad with my music, I wont change it because people told me it’s “bad”.
Society has this idea that everyone should like the music that comes up on the radio, usually having very erotic lyrics. I personally don’t like this genre of music, just don’t tell me my taste is stupid because it doesn’t talk about ass and tits. People must learn that different people have different tastes in music, and do not necessarily have to be a carbon copy of what is on the radio.
Whatever music you like, just sit back and enjoy it, because it’s the best way to feel better with yourself and with others. If the lyrics relate to your life, enjoy them. If the music describe an emotion you felt or are feeling at the moment, let it describe your feelings. If it tells you a story about a life situation, learn from it. If it’s all about booty, laugh your ass off to it. It doesn’t matter at all if you’re happy while listening to your music.
– A Buried Opinion‘s idea. Thanks!
– Chris K.
Yes, this might be a cliché topic. But bands surely taught me things no teacher can teach.
When you go to school, they teach you how to solve an equation to find X, how to respect rules, how to become “successful”. But you know what they don’t teach you? They don’t teach you how to be happy. They don’t teach you how to make other people happy.
You know the feeling of watching your favorite band perform live? I personally havent been to many concerts, but I can tell you that the ones I went to made me feel happy.
My obsession over Against the Current and All Time Low didn’t just come down from the skies and hit me on the head. The way the band members interact with their fans makes them so awesome, they dont even have to try to make people happy. It just comes naturally with their own personalities.
Can school teach you how to be happy the way you favorite band can? I bet you not.
Don’t be embarrased that you like bands. You are just as happy as that tool who just got an iPhone 6+, maybe even more because your favorite band doesn’t come in different colors.
I know i went off-topic right now, but the point is that bands saved me stress, and they taught me that there is more to life than just being “successful”.
– Chris K.